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Joanna Bliss And Michelle Monaghan: A Very Busty Bath [Babes] She's Got A Gift [Flesh Flicks] If there was a school for talking dirty, she'd be at the head of her class..and we suspect she'd also be making honor roll for blowjobs, handjobs, and tittyfucking too. (Man, why isn't there a school like that?) · blowjob and cum on her face (xtube.com) Recommended Reading: Of Youth and Lovers Gearing up for Sex:Tech (which starts in two days!) I came across the sex week postings on a website called The Next Great Generation. It's a marketing site packaged as an opportunity for youth to "speak for themselves". It's a bit of a head scratcher. Of course youth are already, and always have been, speaking for themselves. And the Internet is one of the richest sites to find such speech. So a self-serving site by a marketing company is a bit hard to swallow as an innovative or radical idea. Why is it that people in positions of power and privilege stop always confuse their inability to listen with marginalized groups inability to speak. We the marginalized (youth aren't the only ones with fewer rights) are all speaking, all the time. We even sometime yell and bang on the window trying to get your attention. If you want to hear what we have to say, just show up, and listen. Admittedly is not an easy task. But I digress. Despite the flimsy premise, and many posts that seem to be written by youth who are working in marketing (at least I think that's what they do, many of them refer to working for "agencies" which I'm pretty sure isn't the euphemism I'm used to it being), I came across a short piece that I just loved. Written by a journalism and philosophy student Alex Pearlman, and called My Decision To Take A Lover, it's well worth reading. In it Pearlman tries to carve out of the media mess that is young sexual representation, something of her own experience. She describes the struggle to find time to make any sort of sexual contact, and the differences between partners, hook ups, booty calls, and lovers. She writes: "A lover is not a boyfriend. A lover is not a friend with benefits. A lover is a person you meet who you maybe go out with once or twice, but, let's face it, you don't have time to devote yourself to. A lover is more than a booty call, and although they do serve a similar purpose, a lover is more than just sex." The piece is funny and personal and practical (how great to read something about sex that manages to be both evocative of the joy of sex and deal with real life stuff like paying rent and getting work done). It's not without its idealism. I wish Pearlman were right when she suggests that a lover is the "one person in your life that isn't stressful" when in reality, if you keep your lover long enough, stress will come. But it feels more like hope and promise instead of hype or pollyannish. I'd love to quote more of it here, but you should just go read it. Read more - My Decision to Take a Lover (from The Next Great Generation or direct from Alex Pearlman's Blog) Recommended Reading: Of Youth and Lovers originally appeared on About.com Sexuality on Wednesday, February 24th, 2010 at 00:01:06. Permalink | Comment | Email this No, It's Not A Rozlyn Papa Sex Tape [Sextapes]
Helen Gurley Brown and American Sexual Culture Shannon Kane Has "Brooklyn's Finest" Boobs [Movies] Who'd have thought that a gritty crime drama set in Brooklyn would have a steamy sex scene with a whole lot of boobage? Probably just about anyone who's ever seen a gritty crime drama, actually. (Bonus: no Dennis Franz ass.) [NB: Do not adjust your speakers. The clip does, in fact, seem to be silent.] · "Brooklyn's Finest" (imdb.com) Molecular Condoms BeautifulPeople.com's Purge of the Unworthy Cannot Change Sexual Orientation (No Such Thing as an Ex-Gay) Sex Work and Disability Reconsidered Bethany Stevens, on her new Crip Confessions blog, has a post about sex work and disability that's well worth reading. On the few occasions when the topic of sex work and disability comes up, it's usually presented in simple ways. It's either a radical topic that makes you think and then affirm your groovy sex positiveness. Or it's a travesty, a double exploitation (after all, to the narrow minded and paternalistic on the left and the right, who are better pity targets than sex workers and disabled people? Imagine that telethon). In fairness, this topic isn't something people have written or talked much about publicly, so the discussion is new. Which makes Stevens' commentary all the more exciting, as it begins to untangle a complex mess of issues and experience. Her focus in the post isn't as much the public discussion as it is the existence of government policy that funds sex specifically for people with disabilities. It's a policy that irks her, and she writes: While many disabled people are economically ghettoized, the framing of policy like this reinforces the charitable model of disability by implicating that disabled people are sexually-deprived. It supports the already pervasive claim that disabled people are not sexually worthy and thereby must seek out the services of a professional, because few, if any, would voluntarily have sex with us. Note that Stevens' problem is not narrowly focused on the policy itself, it's with the framing of the policy. Indeed she goes on to talk about how these policies, while problematic, serve both practical and philosophical functions, calling us all to look not just at the policies and practices that surround sex work and disability, but at the conditions within which such policies and practices develop. Over the course of my many years as a sex educator working in both rehabilitation and disability communities, and as an ally to disabled friends, family, and lovers, these issues, both in theory and practice, have come up often. I remember a man I corresponded with in Germany who had access to direct funding from the government in order to pay for services he needed related to his disability. But he was required to submit receipts and, essentially, justify any expenses which weren't standard on the government forms. He was able to use the money for things like massage, talk therapy, homeopathy, etc... He wanted to use his money for sex work as well, and he didn't see this as fundamentally different (he described all these things as human needs). Whatever I, or anyone else, thinks of the way he experiences sex work, the bottom line was that because of his disability he was required to justify what he would spend his money on, something that I as a non-disabled person would never have to do. Were I living in Germany I wouldn't have to do this with tax refunds, I wouldn't have to do this with unemployment insurance, I wouldn't have to do it period. From my perspective (which is, of course, heavily informed by being currently non-disabled) this is first and foremost an issue of access. In the case of the man from Germany this is probably fair because he was identifying it as an access issue. The problem, which Stevens so skillfully teases out, is that I (we?) can easily generalize and say this is always an issue of access, and sometimes come to believe that this is only an issue of access. Stevens points out that this is about much more than access. Embedded in the do-gooder sex-positive agenda that says people with disabilities should have free access to sex workers is a denial of other important ways that disabled people are systemically denied sexual rights. The lived experience of many people with visible disabilities is that it's much much harder to find sexual partners. Random hook ups, long term relationships, monogamous marriages, you name it. If you look disabled you get the message that these things aren't for you. I've been involved in a couple of different ways in making connections individually and organizationally between sex worker groups and disability activists. I do think that there are important access issues that need to be addressed. But Stevens post is a welcome reminder for me that when I only focus on access, I'm not only missing out, I'm shutting out, which is the opposite of how I want to live my life. Read more - Crip Confessions: Paying for Pleasure: Interrogating Sex Work for Crips Previously - Sex Work Debate and a Denmark Nursing Home ; Sex Work and Disability ; Adult Film Offers a Good Opportunity to Talk About Sex and Disability Related - Sexuality and Disability Resources on About.com Sex Work and Disability Reconsidered originally appeared on About.com Sexuality on Friday, February 26th, 2010 at 00:01:20. 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